Thoughts I had when my partner was giving birth

“I wish I was in the waiting room with a cigar right now”

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“How can I get some sleep?”

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“I should be doing more.”

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“I’m useless”

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“Look at her face, not her vagina”

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“That’s the biggest thing I’ve ever seen!” (upon seeing the head for the first time)

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“Don’t say the wrong thing or the nurses will get mad at me”

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“I’m so proud of her!”

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“How is she so happy right now?” (when it was over)

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